Update.....

Well it has certainly been awhile since I last posted, but that doesn't mean things haven't been happening for us down here in Utah, so I thought I would take a few minutes to let everyone know where our plans stand at the moment.

We are definitely moving back to Washington this year. Our original plans were to wait until our current leasing contract expires at the end of July to move, but things got pressed forward and we began looking at breaking our contract early (and paying a hefty fine) in order to move at the end of May. We even took a very brief journey northward for Richard to attend a job interview and to look at housing in the area. I admit that while I want to move back closer to family, the idea of rushing forward was pretty overwhelming to say the least, so it was a toss-up of feelings when Richard received the news that while the company liked him, that they had currently filled their positions for the branch he was interested in. Not that he is out of the running, as they will be bringing people in throughout the year, but they just don't need him at this time.

Which is a bit of a relief really, because I had nightmares of his moving up before me, finding housing just that much sooner, and handling the move down here entirely on my own.... which I would have done if necessary, but I find myself thankful that it will not be the case.

So we are back to our original plan of moving at the end of July.

Why move at all since we both have fairly good jobs down here in Utah? Well, good employment isn't the most important thing, is it? We both want to move in order to be closer to my family, and I find that I have missed the closeness of my sisters, and Richard has wanted to live in Washington ever since he was stationed there in the Navy back in the 90s. Our brief trip home had us both feeling that this was where we needed to be, and there are blessings in store for us not only now, but in the days and years to come. Washington is where we need to be, and this is the time to do it. Our prayers and thoughts have been directing us towards this goal for well over a year now, and they are stronger than ever. We go where the Lord wants us to go, and if it happens to be closer to where my family resides then so be it.

I admit that there are things about Utah that I will miss... and I will be leaving some very dear friends that I have made here, but I firmly believe that this is the right course for us, and I will take the bitter along with the sweet. Even with the things that I will miss, my heart still longs for the green fields and pine-covered mountains, for the clear (and far cleaner) air and bright starlit skies of my northward home. I have missed it dearly over the years I have spent here, and it is definitely time to return. Our visit simply strengthened that resolve.

There was a lot of good that came from the rushed plans... I began downsizing my considerable stash of stuff... and we donated a lot of items to a yard sale a friend of mine was holding for charity. It was such a refreshing thing to unburden our load, so to speak, that it has inspired me to keep downsizing. Oh trust me when I say we will still have a sizable load to move, but without some of these items the move already seems as if it will go that much smoother, and I find myself worrying less about the task to come. It is no secret that I absolutely hate to move, and would much rather stick with a place that I am not entirely happy with rather than to pack everything up to haul it elsewhere, so this move is a pretty big step for me to begin with. Anything I can do to lighten that load for ourselves cannot be bad in my book... besides, I have a tendency to be a bit of a pack rat (yes, I know, that is an understatement, isn't it?) so its good to be able to de-junk my life a bit.

More on the move as things develop, but I just wanted to let everyone know where we stand right now. Yes, there are a few things that I am failing to share, but rest assured that when the time is right we will be letting you know. Until then, I hope you all know just how much we both love you, friends, family and all.

Gratitude...

is after a long stress-filled week where you can't seem to find a way to calm down and just want to cry... to step outside, breathe in cool air, look up and find solace just watching the stars slowly appear in the evening sky. To find beauty in something so simple as sitting peacefully and just let your mind clear.

My last few weeks have been extremely stressful with work...the busy season has come full swing and I rarely seem to find a moment to use the restroom, let alone take a break. I've come home with severe headaches pretty much every day and find myself being short and snippy with everyone, and find myself hours after being home, still tense and on edge.

What a relief last night to be able to find time to sit outside, marvel at the stars, and be able to sit quietly. I said a prayer and almost immediately felt the stress just flow from my shoulders, down my arms and right out of me. It was amazing. I sat there so quietly in fact that a neighborhood stray cat walked right past me without seeming to notice I was there, and I held myself still while he ate some of the food we leave outside for just that purpose. Poor thing looked fairly starved, so I was glad that my outdoor excursion didn't prevent him from getting in a meal.

After he walked off I sat there still, amazed that my headache was finally melting away, and burst into tears. I've cried a few times since then, but I feel better with each crying spell as a little more of my frustrations and tension seem to fade away.... and while I am certain that they will find me again come Monday morning, at least, for this moment anyway, I am nearly back to normal...or at least what I consider to be normal for me. Still some stress in here...but a lot less than what I came home with.

I am counting down the days until my 4-day mini vacation in two weeks....I think I am seriously going to need every second of it, and am very happy that its nearly here. Fingers crossed and prayers sent upward that I can hang in there....